Feb 3. 2009 11:16 am.

Letter to Myself:

You hate your school. You don't enjoy it, and you think it offers nothing to you. You have no desire to any work, no desire to go to any classes. No drive to do any school work. But the fact of the matter is, this is the school that I chose to go to. This is the place that I planned to spend 4 of years, maybe even more, of my life at. So, I need to deal with the consequences of my decision. Just because something isn't turning out the way that I want to, doesn't mean that I should just run away from it. Although, I would love a change of lifestyle, rushing to move, go to another school, start another life? Thats a pretty grown, and likely permanent decision. I need to pull my socks up, get my life together, and get back on the track that I started off on last year. Letting situations get the best of me, stopping and holding me down, is only going to be a detriment to me. If you need to make friends, this isn't highschool where you are surrounded by the same people everyday, and becoming cool with the people in your class is inevitable. You are going to have to go out of your way, to make friends. You are going to have to join organizations and clubs, get out there and meet people. You aren't shy and you know it. You definately aren't an introvert and you definately know that. Why are you choosing to not be the person that you KNOW you are? Get out there! Have the university experience! Stop hiding behind the shadow of your pride. Your twisted and offset pride. Thats restricting you from being happy, because you are worried about what these people, who don't know you, and if they reject you, will never know you... what these people will say about you. You are on the road to failing your credits. You are going to fail your credits. Stop the bs. Cut the crap. You've managed to let yourself go, because you have lost who you are. Again. This is wack. Just go and talk to someone! Most of the people that you know are out, having fun. Enjoying the university/college life. Why are you choosing to be miserable and lonely?